Saturday, February 21, 2009

Everyone is dumb, but me....

Did you ever say that to yourself? I'm guessing you have. I say it to myself all the time. Like, when I heard about the Firefox browser, at first, I said, well, I've never heard of that, must be dumb. Then I looked it up online, and downloaded it and WOW. I said to myself, I am so smart to have found Firefox, it's so FAST!! It is, seriously fast, like the stealth bomber, except it won't fall apart and crash on someone's house. And the government has nothing to do with it so it's tax free....for now.

So, today, my little anti virus icon is yellow, meaning I better find out what's going on, cuz yellow means "caution" and all. So it says I need to download here. Okay, so I click, and what happens? IE opens up (Internet Explorer). Well, again I say to myself, "Well, that's dumb that I can't make it open in Firefox but I so do not have time to mess with this dumb thing because I have a blog to write. And I already spent a hundred hours trying to figure it out before and it apparently only likes IE, so that's just dumb. I thought Bill Gates was smart so why his anti virus only works in IE is so totally dumb!

Well, I come here all irritated and everything because I hate IE, and I start typing about how dumb everything is and I get to the point where I type about my anti virus being yellow and my computer freezes up. Again...DUMB IE!! So I click on that, and after all that time nothing had happened on IE cuz it froze up all dumb and stuff. So I go get more coffee, wishing I liked brandy and whiskey cuz I'd so be adding some of that to my coffee, but I don't so I'll just have to be sober and mad.

So the dumb IE finally loads it's dumb page and I click on the update icon...again! The box pops up saying "download 1 of 1". Well, thank the good lord for that because that dumb download is putting a good 248 MB on my computer! Taking up good space I could be downloading other cool stuff onto. But no, I have to update my anti virus because of all the DUMB hackers and virus creators who have nothing better to do with their dumb lives then make our really cool and smart lives miserable.

Okay, so after all this talk about all the dumb stuff going on in my computer it still has only loaded 46 MB of it's dumb 248 MB so I might as well go shopping or something. Maybe I'll send Bill and email and tell him how dumb IE is because he just doesn't know it yet, even though he probably totally owns it but I can't look it up because the dumb download is hogging all my PF usage and totally slowing down my computer. Then maybe he'll say that I'm so smart he needs to hire me to help him spend his money making really cool websites that are way better then IE and I'll be famous and everyone with totally know how smart I am.

BTW, only 72 MB downloaded! Dumb download!

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